Customer Service – The Conversation

(The original conversation took place in Spanish.)

- I’d like to return this item.
- You want to return this?
- Yes, please.
- You’d like to return this?
- Yes.
- For credit.
- No, could you please put t back on my credit card?
- You can’t.
- What do you mean?
- You can’t return it.
- Yesterday before I purchased it, I asked if it was returnable because I wasn’t sure if it would go with what I thought it would. And, I was told I could.
- When did you buy it?
- Yesterday.
- That’s the problem.
- What's the problem?
- You bought it yesterday. If you wanted to return it, you needed to return it yesterday.
- But, yesterday, the girl told me that I could return it as long as I had the receipt.
- Yes, but that was yesterday.
- Right here (pointing to a sign at the register), it says I have 15 days to return an item.
- Yes, you do but for store credit.
- It doesn’t say that here nor does it anywhere in the store. In addition, the clerk didn’t tell me yesterday when I asked about returns.
- She should have known better. It’s always been that way.
- But this is my first time buying something here. How was I to know?
- That's the way it's always been. If I give you your money back, it will mess up my balance. We can only cut you a check and they will take a while because we have to send the request to the main office.
- I’m asking you to place it on my credit card. I’m not asking for cash or a check.
- That’s the only way. Or, you can have store credit.

My failed attempt to reason with the store manager at Estampa today.

Flooding Fiasco

In the area where we live, there is a tendency toward flooding during the rainy season. The sewer/ drainage system has been blocked for quite a while now creating massive ponds that rise up to most car doors when the rain is exceptionally heavy. (Good reason to have an SUV, however small). Apparently, the homeowner associations within the area have been involved in a dispute with the local government as to how to solve the problem. Finally, after numerous calls, followups, meetings, and several rainy seasons, the first step to "unplug" the drainage system was completed this past week. We received an email to confirm this.

The email read like this - and I quote (translate) - "It is my pleasure to announce that the first drain was unplugged Wednesday morning releasing into the sea great quantities of garbage, sewage, and other offensive matter...(the company responsible) will continue dredging and drainage work. We will have to wait until the next rainfall to see the results."

Is it just me, or does it sound awkward to say that it is one's pleasure to announce that sewage and other waste is being released into the sea?... in great quantities, nonetheless... At this, I can only sigh.

Panamanian Women Don't Sweat

Seriously, Panamanian women do not sweat. They don't perspire. Their makeup doesn't run down their faces when they step out into the the 90+ degree heat. Their hair doesn't look like a scouring pad in this 99% humidity the moment they get out of the car. They simply "glow". They wear long pants and long-sleeved shirts. They can even get away with the layered look if they'd like. I don't get it. Is there a particular gene that I'm lacking?

Me, on the other hand, ever since I've been here, I've said that if you want twice the body and three times the curl in your hair, come to Panama. Sweat? I wear shorts and a tank top, put my hair up in a pony tail (2 out of 3 are fashion no-nos, by the way), and still, one step out the door, and I look like a just got out of a pool and had my hair blown dry to resemble Bozo the Clown. By the way, did I mention I normally have naturally straight hair? Now, I've been told that there are hair straightening treatments, which I would never have dreamed I needed when living in the States. Ok, I may look into that. But, other than having a talk with the Big Guy Upstairs and asking Him to lower the temps and humidity a bit, any suggestions on how to get "the glow"?

Well, it's time to walk the dog - make up free (check), pony tail (check), shorts (check), antiperspirant (check). Honestly, who cares? I'll just take a shower when I get back.

Rainy Season, Dog Walking and Jhonny Andres, the Peruvian sandwich vendor

I was taking our little wiener dog for a walk this morning. Walking may not be the appropriate word here. It's more like dragging him through the streets with all the force I could muster. (Quite a scene when you consider I'm fighting with a 16 lb. dog in front of 3000 construction workers. Always good for a dose of entertainment.) Since rainy season has started, it's a daily battle getting our little guy out and about. He hates getting wet, and with his undercarriage so low to the ground, it's inevitable this time of year. He returns home covered in mud and gunk, only to have be showered to get all that grime off of him. Vicious, torturous cycle for the little guy, don't you think? And, frankly, I hate to tell him this, but he's got another 7 months to go before we are in the clear, literally. This year with La Nina we are told to expect drenching rains/ thunderstorms at least 5 out of every 7 days through October. They can sugarcoat it and call lit "green season" all they want, but it's still rain. I have to admit though, the grass is greener, the waves higher, and the air cleaner. There are some advantages, I guess.

Ok, so what does walking our mini-dachshund have to do with Jhonny Andres the sandwich vendor? We pass him every day as we walk, or in recent days - attempt to walk - to the park to meet up with all of our other doggie friends. Jhonny is a kind soul. No matter what, he has a smile on his face and an inspiring word to say. Not once in the last 7 months since we started to exchange pleasantries have I seen him down or unsettled. Grant it, I see him for 5 minutes a day, but it's enough to know that he's a gentle person. Today was different - (not for our dog who was still urging me to go home after only walking a block) - but for Jhonny. The twinkle wasn't there, nor the smile. Made me worry. And, where I normally would have rushed by explaining that my baby wanted to head home, I couldn't today. Just down the street, a police officer was handing out tickets to all of the ambulatory vendors. That wasn't bothering him. He would pay it and continue with is day. He was feeling just fine, not ill. But, then, he mentioned that he wouldn't be coming in the afternoons anymore. It seems that construction is slowing down, a rumored halt on one of the buildings, and he just couldn't afford to stick around in the afternoons. The only response I could come up with was, "Then what use is walking the dog if I have no one to stop and talk to?" I got a little smile, though I know it was only temporary.

Admittedly, a part of me was overjoyed by the possibility that construction was slowing. I'm so tired of the noise and the commotion, but that's just my own selfishness. We're talking about a man's livelihood here. I guess I will continue to see Jhonny in the mornings as I drag my mini-hotdog out, but those afternoon walks will leave me wondering where Jhonny is and how he's doing. Has he found a new corner on some other block to sell his sandwiches? How's his family? How will they make ends meet if he only works mornings?

In the end, he will be another to add to the list of vendors who have disappeared - like the cousins from Pereira, Colombia whom I haven't seen in over a month. And, I'm sure, every day as I go out on my walks, I will wonder where they are and how they are doing and how their families are and if, perhaps, they have made it back to their respective homelands. Unfortunately, once they are gone, I will never know.